Live the questions...

Yoga raises more questions than it answers.

Why can’t I put my foot behind my head yet? 

Why am I scared of inversions? 

How do I align my hips in half moon? 

What is the point of Ujjayi breath? 

Why do get angry in Half Pigeon?

It can be irritating and unnerving, especially in a society where we are expected to be, and are rewarded for being, decisive, knowledgeable and forthright. 

However, when we pause and we begin to practice within those questions our practice grows. Instead of forcing a pose, when we ask what’s going on and take the time to breathe and be okay with not really knowing, something magic happens and we find that it gets easier and before we know it we’re in a place we never expected to be.

Similarly, off the mat, when we begin to live the questions we begin to investigate ourselves and we get to know ourselves on a deeper, more authentic level.

Remember the last time you met someone new, perhaps a first date or a job interview – those times are all filled with questions. Often the true answers don’t come until much later when you really experience that person, that relationship, that job.  You find the things you love over time, the quirks, the annoying habits that you’d be lost without, the short cuts and organization you need.

In the same way, life unfolds itself slowly to us, but for some reason we stop asking the questions. We start to believe we know it all.

Just for today allow yourself to challenge that:  ask every question, live every question. Stop preempting the answer, be safe in the knowledge that it will come in time, but for now investigate, experiment and play in the unknown.

As Deepak Chopra says “Accept what you do not know and what you do not know you do not know”. Breathe into those spaces, and in that place of intrigue, of mystery, of magic, find the fullness of life. Return to your childlike innocence where the wonder and the wild things are, the places where everything is new, surprising and fantastic. Let go of the “I know” of the ego and be okay with the “I wonder”. In this place … in the questions … truly anything is possible

Mini Moon: Set Your Goals

The Full Wolf Moon rises tonight, and even though it's a mini-moon it is, as with every full moon, a powerful night for intention setting and magic making.

Take a few moments this evening to work out your goals for the next 4 weeks. What do you want to achieve, how are you going to achieve it and what are you willing to give up to achieve it?

Grab a pen and paper and find a peaceful cosy spot.

Sit quietly for a few minutes. Imagine yourself having already achieved your goals. Pay attention to how you feel, to what the accomplishment will bring you. After playing out this scenario a few times write down everything you experienced.

Know tonight that seeing truly is believing. If you can imagine your success it can and will be accomplished.

Dream. Believe. Act. Succeed.

Want to know a little more about the moon names and meanings? Check out The Farmers' Almanac:

Full Wolf Moon – January. Amid the cold and deep snows of midwinter, the wolf packs howled hungrily outside Indian villages. Thus, the name for January’s full Moon. Sometimes it was also referred to as the Old Moon, or the Moon After Yule. Some called it the Full Snow Moon, but most tribes applied that name to the next Moon. - http://www.farmersalmanac.com/full-moon-names/

Climb climb climb

I read a beautiful article today in which Baron Baptiste describes yoga on and off the mat as ascending a peak with multiple pitches. What a perfect visual.

Successful climbers don't just wake up and start walking up a hill, they plan and prepare.

(1) Pick your peak: What is your goal? What are you trying to achieve?

(2) Plan: There's balance in there. Too much planning and you can get caught up in details and stuck on this idea of perfection ... not enough and you go in blind. Allow yourself time to figure out what it is you want, what you're aiming for, what you're willing to do and, importantly, what you are willing to give up to achieve your goals. And then relax, be prepared to be flexible and open-minded both on the journey and to the outcome.

(3) Check your gear: know yourself. Know what makes you tick, what makes you vulnerable, what your strengths are. On the mat it is always crucial to know where you may be strong, where flexible, where weak and where inflexible, only when you know that can you safely approach each posture without risk of injury. Off the mat this is equally critical - knowing your limits so that you can skirt them, press them, challenge them without throwing yourself so far over them that you feel defeated and broken.

(4) Train: Everything is a practice, keep at it, keep trying and learn from each push

And as Baptiste says: Precision is different to Perfectionism.

When you work with precision on the mat, you will feel empowered to make positive changes in your life too. "With a mindful, conscious practice, you can connect with your personal power, your ability to change your life."
Perfectionism is rife with self-criticism and judgement. Begin to cast judgement on your pose, your practice, or yourself as 'right' or 'wrong', and the ledge you're on can expand into a never ending plateau of self-doubt.

(5) Find a guide: It's an innately human floor to be too afraid / proud / shy to ask for help. Whatever your reason - get over yourself - we all need help, we all need a guide. Whether it's a teacher(s) you love for your yoga practice or someone you can bounce ideas off and confide in, make sure you have someone to support you and nurture you. Pick your guide carefully, they must have your best interests at heart and you must trust them completely, the type of person who knows that they will grow just in the process of assisting you in being your absolute best and most successful.

(6) Start climbing: We often spend so long planning, preparing, fretting and wondering about the what ifs that we forget to get going. You're not going to get anywhere if you don't start somewhere.

(7) Keep checking in: Every step of the way. You are not static. With each challenge, each posture, each goal you start to strengthen and open certain areas of yourself physically, mentally and emotionally. As certain areas grow you begin to expose new areas, which, it goes without saying, will start weaker. Be gentle with the new space. Check back with yourself - what now makes me tick, what now makes me vulnerable, what now are my strengths. Constant self-observation and self-reflection keeps us strong, motivated, honest and empowered.

(8) Trust your foundation: What is it that holds you up. Learn to trust the people, community, practices that hold you steady so that you can reach up for the next uncertain footing.

(9) Forget the peak and enjoy the scenery: Don't forget to breathe and look around you. The goal is great, the peak is the triumph, but it's a long journey and you can approach it 2 ways. You can miserably push yourself ever forward, head down, eyes on the prize. Or, you can choose to enjoy every step, every slip-up, every moment of success and failure, learning and growing always.

Don't aim to make it in one text-book journey to your goal - aim to make it a fun, full, heart-filled experience.

Take it off the mat

Before moving to NYC I worked with an amazing dog trainer in LA for a little over a year. When I first called him I was at the end of my leash (pun intended!); I'd tried a number of techniques, a number of trainers all with no success. My pups are both young, boisterous boys, and they were beginning to show some pretty strong signs of aggression.

When I first called Matt, he was my last hope, I felt like I was a danger to my dogs; that in all likelihood, if things kept going the way they were, I would end up with either a legal battle after a bite, or worse, losing my young pup, Maverick.  On that very first phone call with The Zen Dog I was calmly told "you'll learn more about yourself in this process then you will about your dogs, this is a change you have to make".

If you're in LA you can find the amazing support of Matt and Brooklin and their fabulous team at The Zen Dog

A light bulb immediately went off. All these years of yoga practice, and several months of teacher training down, and I still figured that I could force a change in other creatures; that the problem was completely out of my control and the fault of my "aggressive" dogs. To be told so bluntly - it's not them it's you - was empowering. Suddenly I didn't have ill-behaved dogs that needed discipline, rather I was allowing the behaviour to continue and I needed to become Alpha. I didn't have to rely on tricks and treats and squirt guns to regain control (all tried with incredibly short-term success given how quick my smart boys worked out what was going on), rather I had to be confident in myself, find my strength and remain calm and composed.

The key to success: hard work, dedication and trusting the journey ... all the things I had been telling my students to do on their mat and yet I had trouble finding off the mat.

There were so many times I would feel defeated. That the task at hand was too much, too overwhelming to do alone. Luckily I had my gurus at the end of the phone to remind me how far I had already come, how well the pups were responding and how happy and calm they were becoming in the process.

So many moments stand out for me, moments when I lost my calm and the explosion of barking and growling that would follow, moments when I was stressed or emotional in the morning and I would come home to a torn up apartment and a very sorry looking boy in the corner, and moments when I remembered what was needed, I took my time and did my best and both pups responded in kind, by calming down and doing their best to follow their Alpha.

It is a work in progress, I still work daily on Maverick's leash aggression toward other dogs, and on Socks' incessant barking, but I have learnt so much and we have come so far as a mini pack. From having two dogs who couldn't really stand each other, and a young pup who attacked any person or dog who came near me or him, to having two healthy brothers - rough-housing but knowing when to stop, eager to play and well behaved in the off-leash parks, protective in the home but welcoming to all human guests when they see I invite them in.

I found strength in myself - the ability to be strong, be tough but not harsh or mean

I found calmness and patience - the ability to take a breath and pause, allowing my initially reaction to become a positive action

I found balance - to have time to curl up in a ball of fluff for snuggles, but to keep a healthy detachment at the dog park so the boys could be dogs, properly, and figure themselves out

Most of all, and something I never realized I was lacking, I found trust. Trust in my dogs, that they are happy and want this to work as much as I do. Trust in the process, I learnt that being committed to the journey was far more important than being attached to the outcome. Trust in myself, I learnt that I am strong enough and my best is good enough.
It was a break-through for me, to truly believe that sometimes you have to just close your eyes and trust - know that it will be a long journey, but it is worth it, and as I go I am constantly progressing and improving.

“There’s no value in digging shallow wells in a hundred places. Decide on one place and dig deep. Even if you encounter a rock, use dynamite and keep going down. If you leave that to dig another well, all the first effort is wasted and there is no proof you won’t hit rock again. (52)” ― Swami Satchidananda, The Yoga Sutras

Or put another way: